Monday, April 21, 2008

Unlike some people, our cat follows a prudent asset management strategy

Our Cat Follows a Prudent Asset Management Strategy
Our cat does not leverage his glitter balls. He values them and treats them with respect. He has not taken out any glitter ball equity loans to buy an SUV or boat. Nor has he taken out a second glitter ball mortgage to finance any glitter ball remodeling projects, and consequently his glitter ball mortgage is not underwater. And any assets he is not currently using, he keeps on deposit in the bank -- the food bank, that is. Good kitty.

1 comment:

Dr Diablo said...

Avoidance of debt is a crucial element of providing for an uncertain future, but it's hardly the only one. We also need to put by QUALITY ASSETS and store them in a SECURE location. This creature clearly needs a portfolio review.

Sodden, corroded-looking Meow Mix cannot be considered a quality holding. This corn-based product is better suited to sustaining the woodchucks pictured above than to nourishing a carnivore during lean times. Secondly, the open containers ensure that its protein and fat contents will be, respectively, 0% and 0% in short order--within the hour, probably. I recommend that the cat acquire a sound, nutritionally complete product such as Iams Adult, and store it in a sealed container at a concealed but accessible location.

You know, your habit of seeing metaphors for current events in everyday phenomena is rubbing off on me. Last night, my spouse invited me to the patio to sip a beverage and watch the sunset, but I couldn't enjoy watching it; I kept thinking, "That's exactly what's happening to the value of the dollar versus other major currencies." It kind of siphons the joy from living.